In my experience, A/UX definitely can be picky about video cards - it does some clever tricks running video card drivers in a restricted Toolbox environment inside the kernel. In theory, well-behaved cards and drivers will work fine, but compatibility is far from guaranteed.
Both of the cards I own have quirks under A/UX in my IIfx - my Memory Plus 24NB will sometimes cause a hang at boot unless it's the only card in the system, and my E-Machines Futura SX will only do 16 colors in A/UX, despite being able to do 256 under Mac OS. So while it's not quite as helpful as a recommendation, I'd suggest those as ones to avoid!
Some third-party cards definitely are just fine under A/UX, though - many years ago, I had A/UX running on my IIfx with a pair of Radius Two Page Display monitors, driven by Radius video cards of some description (can't remember the exact models, unfortunately).